Wednesday, January 7, 2009


There is yet another story on the news about a parent hurting their child. This time a father,how can they do it? How can any person hold a tiny person in their hands and cause untold pain to them? The younger they are the harder it is for them to grasp that this wonderful amazing human that they look to for love,warmth,food,shelter & PROTECTION is the one who is hurting them!!! I can't even fathom the confusion and pain they are going through. This guy is in the next town over about 10 minutes from us. He apparently twisted his 15 month olds legs until they popped,then he gave the child pain reliever to mask that he'd hurt the child. The mother was working as the news reports all state,but the baby was hurt on Sunday,and the baby wasn't taken to the hospital until Tuesday evening according to reports. The child is now in hospital in protective services care.
I'm still shaky from when I first heard the story on the headline news this afternoon! I can't wrap my mind around why any parent would do this to their own child,to any child! When I hear these types of stories,I look at my children who were not all exactly planned,and think sure finances are tight,they're often way to loud for our apartment,Lord knows where ever they go they leave debris in their wake! I grab them and hold them all the tighter for it though. I try very hard to hold the thought that soon enough they won't want me around,so all the noise,clutter,debris and what have you that comes them is fully embraced by me. I'm not saying that my children don't get under my skin,come on after all isn't that their job? When I'm on the phone and they're doing that ear splitting mum,mum,mum he took my this or that or he's hitting me or can I have a drink that all children do as soon as the person on the other end says hello!,Well of course I threaten to use the sock muffler method,or to throw away the toy in question,I've even threatened to sell them if the bid is high enough,but the thought to cause them any actual physical pain has never crossed my mind!IT makes me hold them tighter and longer.News of child abuse has definitely made me more suspect of every other person in the world though.
The thought that I really don't trust anyone,also makes me sad.I question every ones motives even without realizing I'm doing it. If any male walks near my children and looks at them,or looks to long I question their motives in my head and find myself advancing into a defensive position instantly without even thinking! Not only with males does this happen,any and everyone who I don't know will evoke this behavior from me. I question every bruise my rough & tumble boys get if I've left them for any length of time. My heart just aches when I read stories of parents or any adult hurting a child. I wonder why they don't just bring them in to DHS,or a police station,or even a hospital.Anything is better than hurting them! I realize there are always unknowns in every persons life.We can never know what some one elses life is like,but I do feel we should try to return to a time when the phrase "It takes a village to raise a child" was believed by people and we took time to help our neighbors,shared whatever we had with those around us.
I'm a mum of 2 sets of twins,and a teenage boy.Before the twins came along it was my older son and me against the world! I worked many hours to provide roof,clothes,food,toys,cable even a pony! I wanted him to have things better than I did.I had a partner on and off,and my mother babysat while I worked 3-11 shifts. I realize I missed ALOT,now I'm a SAHM! We have 7 mouths to feed and a cat! We survive on my dh CNA salary! It's not easy,sometimes not fun,tight quarters and we've had our share of difficulties. We love each other though,all of us! People asked us how will we make it with another set of twins? I can't imagine not having them,any,all of them! I feel pretty blessed and special that the great spirit,God,who/whatever made everything gave us,ME such wonderful blessings to nurture,love and raise into the wonderful people they will be(are!).I'm thankful every moment of everyday for all of my children,and just can't fathom how or why anyone could hurt a beautiful gift from the almighty.
I feel like there must be more we can do in our communities to help people not feel so alone and maybe we could prevent some of these injustices to our precious children and animals for that matter.Many folks don't realize that it isn't a far jump from animal abuse to child and human violence. I struggle daily looking for a way that I can do more to help others,even with my own limitations,I still try and help others.I guess I just needed to get some of this out of my head,so I could let it go.I'm told I do alot,but I don't feel I do that much.I feel it even more with every bad news report I read or hear! Here's me hoping we will all strive to do a tiny bit more for others this year without looking for our own paybacks.Yes,I'm doubting yet hopeful in my fellow humans! These are just my random thoughts,not meant to harm any,but if they make others think I'm glad.

1 comment:

  1. Hi, Donna!
    I'm very complimented that you've linked to me (er, all of me!) and I offer you my prettiest curtsy in thanks!

    I alternated between nodding my head, trying to understand "the other side", and laughing during this post. I've threatened to sell my children to the gypsies on more than one occasion (said so to my darling husband. The gypsies wouldn't take him, or i'd offer him up most often of all! :) )

    I think that people just get so abused and feel unloved from their own childhood experiences that they simply don't know how to stop themselves from acting (reacting) out of anger and resentment.
    I know that I sometimes say and do some pretty hurtful things. Which is why it's even more imperative that I offer to my babes the most loving and gentle (and fun!) life possible - to give them the best start and base that I can.
    So they don't have to work so hard to overcome their childhoods. :/

    Sorry this is so long - just wanted to say thanks so much, and "I hear you!"

    Blessings, and I'll see you soon.